Shit just got real, yo.

Re-watched this last night. It was probably because I was still with Tony when I first saw this, when he was being particularly horrible too, but I think I didn’t really “get” this movie when it first came out. Like I had trouble separating the lawyer being rough with the secretary, and the abuse I was going through…last night though, I watched it with Scott, and I swear I noticed every facial expression and every eye twitch from Spader. I was shocked to find how nervous he was, and how gentle he was even when he was being a massive dickhole, and I just never noticed. I guess I also have a better understanding of sadism now, I’m not so scared of it now that I’m coming to terms with my own sadist tendencies.

So this movie used to remind me of manipulation, abuse and the last time I was this close to suicide, now it reminds me of playing soul calibur 2 with nipple clamps on. Which is good, because this movie is too adorable, too sexy, too beautiful, to be ruined for me by my dog fucker ex.